Mixed feelings

On my recent visit to Ahmedabad, I found my school building razed to the ground, to make way for a mall. I got to know that it has been 12 months since the school was demolished.

I felt old and sad.

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I went to my college and came to know that the Principal has changed (But of course! It has been 10 years since I graduated!) One of my favourite professors – our English lecturer – is the Principal now. After a little bit of hesitation, I went into her cabin with the OH to meet her.

‘I remember you,’ she said, ‘You were a very regular student.’

I felt happy.

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I started drooling at the sight of a roadside vendor making vegetable sandwiches outside our college. The very same sandwiches that my friends and I used to heartily devour in our college days. I ordered a couple, and the OH and I shared them. They tasted exactly the same, as they used to – yummy.

I felt elated.

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I went to one of my most favourite places in Ahmedabad – Law Garden – with the OH, and tried to find a vendor who used to sell garma-garam breakfast out of a Maruti van in the early mornings. We got to know that the vendor no longer sells at the Garden any more.

I felt a tinge of sadness.

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I went to my post-grad college, and took the OH to meet one of my favourite professors there. ‘She is a wonderful girl,’ the professor said to the OH, and both men beamed.

I felt proud.

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One of my professors told me, ‘Female population is rapidly on the rise in this college. You know what, this year, in M.Com., there are only 4 male students in one class. The females are in majority.’

I felt hopeful.

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I took the OH for a Chinese dinner at Khau Gali outside Law Garden, after much ado. The man hates Chinese food, and I love it. I was trying to persuade him to try out the fare at Ahmedabad, and he was hesitating. Finally, he relented, and off we went. We ordered a Chinese bhel, something that he had never tasted before. The OH LOVED it, and licked his plate clean. 🙂

I felt thrilled.

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I pointed out all my favourite spots in the city to the OH. It had to be done in a rush, since we had an entire city to see and less than a week to do it in. I realised that I couldn’t sit to my heart’s content on that favourite bench or outside that much-loved lake. I was a passer-by, and I had to pass by.

I felt pained.

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I developed a mild cold and cough while at Ahmedabad, and the entire family swooped in to take care of me. Someone made ginger chai, someone poured a measure of cough syrup into my mouth, and someone got hot water.

I felt loved and cared for. At home.

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My parents shed tears as they saw us off at the airport, last weekend. ‘When will you be back?’ they asked. ‘I will try to be back soon,’ I said.

I felt helpless.